28 February 2010

Why I don't travel abroad more often

As I was having breakfast with a few fellow officers this morning, we decided that it might be interesting to drive the hour or so into Kingston to watch the Olympic hockey finals. According to Google Maps, I live a mere 20 miles from the Canadian border, straight-line distance. In fact, the closest city, in the true sense of the term, isn't Syracuse, New York, but rather, Kingston, Ontario.

Then, reality sunk in; we had to face Army bureaucracy once again...

"Dammit, we need a country briefing to go into Canada", I spat. Foreign travel--even the 20 miles to Canada--required that we get a lengthy briefing from our intelligence officer regarding the diplomatic situation that existed between the US and Canada, and our actions should the US and Canada suddenly sever all diplomatic ties and seal off the border.

"We also need a DA 31 leave form, too, complete with the address and telephone number of the bar we'll be watching the game in", noted one captain.

"Address? Can we just write in 'whichever bar has the greatest amount of chicks'?" I added.

"Don't forget that we need to fill out a risk assessment for the drive to Canada", said a lieutenant. "Which is strange, because it's a lot quicker and safer to drive to Canada than it is to go to work in the morning. Oh, and you need a cover sheet for all of this..."

No wonder I don't get out much...

1 comment:

Lily said...

Did you ever watch "Canadian Bacon" (with John Candy)?
If you did you'd understand the seriousness of the situation!!!